‘Twas the Night Before Trumpness
By: Craig Andresen and Diane Sori / RIGHT SIDE PATRIOTS
‘Twas the Night before Trump, took over the job
And snowflakes everywhere, were a quite angry mob.
Their spirits were drooping, they just didn’t care,
They had been so sure Hillary would be there.
Conservatives were nestled, all snug in their beds,
While visions of greatness, danced in their heads.
I was wearing my 'Make America Great Again' cap,
And we had just settled our brains from 8 years of crap.
When out on the lawn, there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my recliner to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a bat,
Tore open the curtains and frightened the cat.
The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow,
Shown the harsh light of truth on what was below.
When what to our wondering eyes did appear,
But a stretch limousine and gold-plated reindeer.
A glowing orange driver, with the hair of a frump,
We knew in a moment, it had to be TRUMP!
More rapid than eagles, his cabinet they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!
Now DeVos and Ross, now Mnuchin, now Tillerson,
On Perry and Price, and Mad Dog and Carson.
Between killing ObamaCare, and building the wall,
Trump pulled out his phone to gave Bibi a call.
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When the Donald said Jump, they asked him how high.
So up to the house top the cabinet they flew,
With a sleigh full of joy, and Mister Trump too.
And then in a twinkling, we heard on our roofs,
The prancing and pawing of gold-plated hoofs.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Into the White House he came with a leap and a bound!
He was not dressed in fur, from his hair to his shoes,
He was wearing Armani, in subtle grey hues.
A bundle of fun, he had flung on his back,
He looked in control, he was leading the pack.
His eyes – how they twinkled, his mood – it was merry,
His cheeks looked less orange, and his hair looked less
scary.
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And both of his chins were as white as the snow.
What was left of islamists he clenched in his teeth,
While the smoke from his ears circled his head like a
wreath.
He had a broad face, and a round little belly,
That shook as he laughed like a bowl full of jelly.
He was bigger than life, and ready to lead,
And I smiled when I saw him, he‘s just what we need.
A wink of his eye, and a nod of his head,
And before I knew it, Obama’s mandates were dead.
He tweeted his orders and went straight to his work,
He called Sharpton an idiot and Jackson a jerk.
He gave liberals the finger and ISIS a thumping,
And before he was done, he gave the media a lumping!
He sprang to his limo, to his team he did shout,
Let’s finish that wall and kick the illegals all out!!!
But I heard him exclaim, ere he got up to go…
I’ve changed my mind…I’m sending Hillary to GITMO!!!
For
those who missed our RIGHT SIDE PATRIOTS 'Christmas Special' (or just
want to listen in again) where we discussed both the history and
traditions of the holiday, and recited a very special RIGHT SIDE
PATRIOTS retelling of 'The Night Before Christmas,' it will be rerun
tonight at midnight and throughout the week on American Political Radio
at bit.ly/2cpXuRd
For
those who missed our RIGHT SIDE PATRIOTS 'Christmas Special' (or just
want to listen in again) where we discussed both the history and
traditions of the holiday, and recited a very special RIGHT SIDE
PATRIOTS retelling of 'The Night Before Christmas,' it will be rerun
tonight at midnight and throughout the week on American Political Radio
at bit.ly/2cpXuRd
